In the spirit of April Fools Day, I wondered what it would be like if Chuck Norris was in the Training Department. There is a site dedicated to Chuck Norris facts.
Here are some that I thought of, what about you?
- Chuck Norris…
- can close a performance gap with his fist
- will roundhouse any learning objective that starts with “understand”
- can make other people receive his context sensitive help
- is invisible to the LMS…his training cannot be tracked
- scares learning into performance results
- measures his student’s time to proficiency in seconds
- can squeeze the ROI out of any learning initiative
- can make learning an event that you will never be able to forget
- is immune to cognitive overload
- is the highest level proficiency within any competency
- evaluates his training results at a Level 6
- intimidates learning to transfer to the job
- can blend learning with his bare hands
- is his own Personal Learning Network (PLN)
- can deliver asynchronous training synchronously
- can make you unlearn something by staring at you
- can make his whole class grow a beard
- will shoot your PowerPoint bullets at you if you try to use them in your presentation
- can solve a problem using the same thinking he used to create the problem
- delivers training as if all students have the same learning style – pain
- doesn’t care who started the learning myth…he’ll finish it
- Business goals align to Chuck Norris’s learning needs
- SCORM is Chuck Norris compliant
- Telling is not training unless Chuck Norris says it is
- People would rather die than role play with Chuck Norris
- The company had to onboard to Chuck Norris when he arrived
- The only spatial learning you need to worry about is to get out of Chuck’s space
- If you participate in mLearning created by Chuck, you’ll be running for your life.
If you have suggestions, let me know. Here are some:
- Chuck Norris’ iPhone is Flash compatible - Ryan Tracey
- Chuck Norris’s sensei asked Chuck to mentor him - @criticallearner
- Chuck Norris doesn’t have time to use the ADDIE model, he just uses the DIE model - Tgilmore
- Chuck Norris doesn’t use the ADDIE model because it is too inefficient. Instead he uses the DIE model – Learn or DIE – Tgilmore
- 100 of participants surviving Chuck’ training approve of Chuck Norris’s new model - - Tgilmore
- All Chuck Norris learning objectives are terminal - @moehlert
- Chuck Norris is faster than rapid learning - @gm_docebo
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